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Don't Regret Too Much

In this life, we have experienced and faced many things, be it a good one or a bad one. We have made mistakes, we missed out opportunities, or do something hurtful even though we didn’t mean it. Those kinds of things often left us with regret.

We are not perfect. We often made mistakes and then regret it. Sometimes when we remember those things, we would cry and really want to fix it. But we can’t turn back time, we also can’t do anything in order to change it. If I can do that, I would definitely tell myself not to do those things and doing something better instead. But the fact that we can’t do that, only left us one thing to do which is just forget it and take lessons from it.

Making mistakes is normal and it’s human nature. They are what helped us to grow and learn. Mistakes are what helped us to become different and better versions of ourselves.

Start today, we have to forgive ourselves for all the mistakes that we have made so we can move forward and get in with our life. The person who did those mistakes is not you, it’s the younger version of you. Now you are a completely different person with different experiences, knowledge, wisdom, and insights. Let yourself off the hook, it’s alright, everyone makes mistakes.

Kathryn Schulz, an American journalist and author, in her Ted Talk about regret once said “The point isn’t to live without regrets. The point is to not hate ourselves for having them. We need to learn to love the flawed, imperfect things that we create  and to forgive ourselves for creating them. Regret doesn’t remind us that we did badly. It remind us that we know we can do better”.

Regret is a really powerful space in our lives, If you had a regret early on in life, it allows you to immediately refocus. It’s like sickness in the body. Your body telling you when you don’t feel well, so that you can learn how to feel good again.

Finally, try to ask yourself what did you learn from this experience. What is this experience trying to teach you. Because from every mistake we can obtain growth and wisdom.

(I wrote it on Pesantren Riset Al-Muhtada's writing camp week 5)

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